No group shots, no old photos, and no sunglasses. We ask the professionals how you can build the best-looking profile this year.
Between (deep breath) Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, Grindr, Feeld, Raya, and a plethora of other dating apps we’ve never heard of, knowing how to take a good dating app photo has never been more of a logistical nightmare. The problem is, even though we’re a good decade into the swiping revolution, many people still thwart their own chances of finding love by posting terrible pics.
“But I only have pictures with mates,” I hear you cry. “I don’t like taking selfies! I don’t want to ask my friends to take a few pics of me down the pub!” Well, guess what, that sort of cowardice isn’t going to get you anywhere. So, to help you curate the best-looking profile possible, we asked the experts for their advice on how to nail your dating app photos.
Don’t hide from the camera
If, in your first few photos, you’re wearing sunglasses or a baseball cap, looking away from the camera, have a busy backdrop or are being photographed from a distance, then you’re essentially setting yourself up to fail. “The viewer needs to be able to tell exactly what you look like in the first five seconds, if not, then you aren’t going to be getting matches,” says dating coach Blaine Anderson.
“Sunglasses and hats create instant emotional distance,” adds Sara Cooper, photojournalist and founder of Onelove Photography. “Even if they feel stylish or confidence-boosting, they block eye contact, which is one of the fastest ways humans build trust. On dating apps, eye contact equals openness. When most of your photos obscure your face, it can read as guarded or unavailable, even if that’s not the intention.”
According to Anderson, the first photo should be a close-up, high-quality photo, where ideally you’ll be looking at the camera. “If you’re looking directly into the camera, then it feels like you’re looking at that person, and you’ll feel much more familiar to them, which is more likely to get you matches,” she says.
You need solid solos and group shots
Do not hide in a crowd in every one of your photos. “You won’t stand out, they’re usually rubbish quality and, more crucially, you’re making [potential dates] work to find you in the shot,” says Saskia Nelson, the head of creative at Hey Saturday. “Not only that, you’re now adding your friends into the mix. They may either be more attracted to one of your mates or they may decide they don’t like the look of them. Neither of those options is going to win you a date.”
Professional photographer Charlie Grosso also says that you should never include a photo with more than four people in it. “This isn’t a police line-up. A prospective date shouldn’t have to work so hard to figure out which one they are.”
A balance, however, is best, according to licensed sexologist and relationship expert at Passionerad, Sofie Roos: “If it’s only you in all pictures—something you might think of as good because, hey, it’s me they should focus on—people can actually think that you don’t have any friends or other people around you. Show that others have already chosen to have you in their life, and that will make you more appealing.”
“Use it only if you’re immediately identifiable,” says Cooper. “Group shots can show social ease, but confusion is a dealbreaker. If someone has to guess which person you are, they’ll move on.” We didn’t say this job was easy.
Let your pictures do the talking about the person you are…
Blaine says that along with images that make clear what you look like, it’s important to have “at least three” photos that showcase your hobbies and lifestyle. “If you like travelling, or playing tennis, include photos that show you doing those things,” she says. “Whatever you’re doing, you want to come across as fun and open and someone who would be pleasant to spend time with.” Professional Tinder photographer Jordan Shields suggests choosing photos where you’re doing activities “that perhaps the other person could see themselves doing with you.”
Like the written bio and prompts, your photos help send a message about the kind of partner you’re looking to attract. “Remember to choose photos that match the kind of person you’re wanting to date or be with,” says Dr Tara Suwinyattichaiporn, certified sexologist and dating expert on Celebs Go Dating. “Showing what you love makes it easy for a potential dater to engage you in conversation.”
Grosso agrees, but says to make sure you don’t fall into Tinder tropes. “The men want to be seen as fun, fit, well-travelled, established, et cetera. That translates into pictures of them on the ski slopes, Machu Picchu, fishing, at weddings in a giant group shot, out with friends drinking,” she explains. “It’s so generic that it doesn’t stand out. After all, who doesn’t like good food and travelling to exotic locations? None of these images offer an entry point for conversation.”
…but don’t neglect captions and prompts
10/10 pictures aren’t an excuse to do a lazy job on the rest of your profile. “Photos do a lot of the heavy lifting, but they work best when paired with thoughtful prompts,” says Quincy Yang, US & Canada CEO of Coffee Meets Bagel. “Our data shows that daters with longer prompt answers that contain more than one sentence get 54 per cent more likes, and daters with at least one prompt filled out are twice as likely to find a match.”
Outfits and grooming are key
Keep shirtless pics to a minimum, says Grosso, if you feature any at all. “Don’t post too many selfies, otherwise you come across as narcissistic” adds Shields.
In terms of clothing and styling, Nelson recommends colour. If you don’t like wearing colour, she suggests finding a backdrop that provides an injection of it. Also, again, no sunglasses—eyes are the window into the soul, after all.
“Do wear new or clean clothes,” suggests Shields, and make sure your grooming is up to snuff too. “Neaten up your beard or facial hair, or go clean-shaven,” he says.
Use photos that show what you look like now
“Photos need to look like what you currently look like,” says Blaine. “So if they’re two or three years old, but you literally look the same, you have the same haircut—that’s OK. But if they’re even six months old, but you look dramatically different, you’ve gained or lost a lot of weight, or you have a beard now, and you didn’t then—you need to get new photos.”
If you’re struggling to decide which photos are an accurate representation of how you look now, get a friend to give you their honest opinion. As Nelson says: “No one wants to feel deceived by their date before they’ve even sat down.”
You can also go even further to keep things fresh, especially when it feels like you’re hitting a bit of a dry spell on the apps. “Keep it current: rotate your photos with the seasons and your latest pursuits,” advises Shan Boodram, Bumble’s sex and relationships expert. “Last winter’s ski trip should give way to this autumn’s weekend getaway or that concert you caught last month. Fresh photos signal you’re active, engaged, and living in the present—not coasting on past glory.”
Avoid shots with people who could be confused for your partner… or child
“[You] shouldn’t be spending [time] making disclosures of, ‘This is not my girlfriend’,” says Grosso. “The same with infants: you don’t need to spend valuable space on your profile, or in your conversation, assuring people you’re not a parent”.
You can edit your pics—but not too much
There’s a lot of stigma associated with editing photos, largely because it promotes an unrealistic beauty standard, but also because, in the realm of dating, if it’s taken to the extreme, it can lead to accusations of catfishing. Still, there’s nothing wrong with a little polishing. Let’s say, for example, someone has snapped a near-perfect photo of you, but there’s a bin in the background or a giant blackhead on your forehead, don’t be afraid to make some digital tweakments.
“Editing photos is like make-up for your pics,” says Stefan-Pierre Tomlin, 2017’s most swiped-right man on Tinder. “A little touch-up is fine, but don’t turn yourself into a Snapchat filter. Keep it real—we’re here to meet you, not your Photoshop doppelganger.”
It’s also painfully obvious when you’re just trying to get a bit more juice out of an old photo with your ex. While it might be tempting to either crop them out or throw a crazy eyes emoji over their face, as Boodram says, it can be incredibly off-putting. “If there’s someone you don’t want to feature in a photo, consider replacing the photo with a solo shot of you doing something you love,” she suggests. Seriously, anything’s better than an emoji.
Confidence and security
For Grosso, your pictures should say to a potential partner that you will not play into their deepest concerns about men. “For women, that’s safety,” she argues, saying that men need to create profiles that show they are trustworthy. “How do you create trust? Eye contact and smiles.”
“You don’t have to be the hottest person on Tinder to attract attention,” says Nelson, “you just have to come across as quietly confident and happy in your skin. This is great as it levels the playing field and gives all guys a chance no matter what they look like.” Make sure your body language is open, that you look confident, and most importantly, don’t include photos where you don’t feel good about yourself at the moment they were taken. You want to send the message that you’re happy with yourself.
Anderson makes a similar point: “Super serious, unsmiling black-and-white photos aren’t good for dating apps,” she says. “Photos that are colourful, and you’re smiling or laughing and looking into the camera, are going to work really well.”
If you’re embracing video, relax
Although it’s many people’s nightmare, video has arrived on dating apps—as have voice notes—and, admittedly, it can be a fun way to show off your personality. But, as it can be difficult to master, it’s not for everyone. There’s nothing worse than a stilted video that leans into cringe clichés. “Avoid that overly rehearsed, ‘Hi, I’m Bob, and I like long walks on the beach’ stuff,” says Tomlin. And remember to keep things light. As Tomlin says, “This isn’t a job interview.”
